Are you experiencing domestic and family violence?

Sometimes domestic and family violence (DFV) can be hard to identify.

If you’re unsure, worried, or think you might be experiencing DFV, you can ask yourself some important questions.

View the video below to see what DFV can look like and how to identify the signs of an unhealthy relationship.

Duration 00:03:36

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Sometimes domestic and family violence can be hard to identify.

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If you're unsure, worried, or think you might be experiencing domestic and family violence, you can ask yourself some important questions.

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The first question is about the types of relationships that domestic and family violence can happen in.

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Ask yourself, is the relationship I am worried about a relationship with my romantic partner or an ex partner, a member of my family or my informal carer?

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If your answer is yes, you might be experiencing domestic and family violence.

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The next question you can ask yourself or someone you trust is the relationship I am worried about a healthy relationship or an unhealthy relationship?

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A healthy relationship makes you feel happy, safe, valued, and respected.

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You trust each other and can talk about your feelings, your opinions, and your problems.

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You try and solve problems together.

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You don't worry about what the other person will say to you or what they will do to you.

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A healthy relationship makes you feel like you matter, but an unhealthy relationship can make you feel scared, unsafe, controlled, or trapped.

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The person in your relationship might make you feel isolated, alone, guilty, or ashamed.

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You might feel worn down, invisible, like you don't matter or you're not heard.

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You might feel sad or bad, and it doesn't seem like your feelings will change.

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You might not have a say in decisions about things you need or what's important to you.

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You worry about what the other person will say to you or do to you.

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If you feel any of these things or think you're in an unhealthy relationship, then you might be experiencing domestic and family violence.

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Another question you can ask yourself or someone you trust is does the person in the relationship I'm worried about use a pattern of physical or non physical violence and abuse against me?

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A pattern means more than once.

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Physical violence is when the person in your relationship hurts your body.

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Non physical violence is when the person in your relationship treats you badly to hurt, scare, or control you.

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Domestic and family violence can be a pattern of physical abuse, a pattern of non physical abuse.

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If you sometimes, often or always feel scared, sad, unsafe, trapped or controlled in your relationship, you might be experiencing domestic and family violence.

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It's important to remember that physical or non physical violence and abuse by anyone in any relationship is never OK.

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If you're not sure you're experiencing domestic and family violence, you can also watch the video What is domestic and family Violence?

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A disability support worker is not the same as an informal carer, but help is still available.

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If you think you're experiencing domestic and family violence or any other unsafe or unhealthy relationship, it's important to talk to someone you can trust.

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You can get support over the phone, online or in person from your doctor or a disability support worker.

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There are many support services you can contact to find out more information or to ask for advice or help.

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You can find out more at our website www.qld.gov.au/neverok

Question 1 - Is the relationship I’m worried about, a relationship with my romantic partner (or an ex-partner), a member of my family, or my informal carer?

The first question you can ask yourself is about the types of relationships domestic and family violence (DFV) can happen in. If the answer is yes, you might be experiencing DFV.

Question 2 - Is the relationship I am worried about a healthy relationship or an unhealthy relationship?

This question you can ask yourself or someone you trust.

A healthy relationship makes you feel:

  • happy, safe, valued and respected
  • that you trust each other, and can talk about your feelings, your opinions and your problems
  • that you try and solve problems together
  • that you don’t worry about what the other person will say to you or what they will do to you
  • like you matter.

But an unhealthy relationship can make you feel scared, unsafe, controlled or trapped.

The person in your relationship might make you feel:

  • isolated, guilty and ashamed
  • worn down, like you don’t matter, or you’re not heard
  • bad or sad and it doesn’t seem like your feelings will change.
  • you might not have a say in decisions about things you need or what’s important to you.
  • you worry about what the other person will say to you or do to you.

If you feel any of these things or think you’re in an unhealthy relationship, then you might be experiencing DFV.

Watch our video on healthy relationships to learn more about feeling happy, safe, valued and respected.

Question 3 - Does the person in the relationship I’m worried about use a pattern of physical violence and abuse against me?

A pattern means more than once.

Physical violence is when the person in your relationship hurts your body.

Non-physical violence is when the person in your relationship treats you badly to hurt, scare or control you.

DFV can be a pattern of physical or non-physical abuse. You can also learn more about the different types of domestic and family violence.

If you sometimes, often or always feel scared, sad, unsafe, trapped or controlled in your relationship, you might be experiencing DFV.

If you’re not sure you’re experiencing DFV, you can also watch the video on our website What is domestic and family violence?

If you think you’re experiencing DFV, or any other unsafe or unhealthy relationship it’s important to talk to someone you can trust.

You can get support over the phone, online or in-person from your doctor or a disability support worker.

There are many support services you can contact to find out more information, or to ask for advice or help.

You can also learn more about the steps you can take to seek help.

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Support is available

If you think you may be experiencing domestic and family violence or if you're unsure and would like advice, support is available.

Get help and support now